Consorting with Dragons Read online

  Even more of Polina’s teeth became visible. “Yes, Lady Risyda, you are correct.”

  “Polly and I studied at Enoqua Academy together,” Risyda continued.

  “Yes, we are old friends,” Polina said to Jasen. “And I so hope that you and I can be friends as well!”

  “Of course.”

  “Well! So pleased we could have this little chat, but I must be off.”

  “Always a pleasure, Polly!” Risyda said. “Don’t trip on your gown on your way across the room, like you did last year!”

  The princess opened her fan with such force that it sounded like the crack of a whip and sauntered off across the room.

  “I love winding her up,” Risyda said with a grin. “No one spins quite as spectacularly as the princess if you do it just right.” Before Jasen could respond to that, she took him by the arm. “And now that we’ve been evaluated, we are free to go, so you’re coming up to my room.”

  “I— That is to say,” Jasen stammered. “I’m flattered, but I don’t think—”

  She whacked him with her fan. “Not in that way. I need to hear every single detail of what happened this morning, and you are going to tell me.”

  Jasen wanted to protest, but he realized that it was probably futile. She was remarkably strong. Besides, he could not wait to get away from the crowd, and he didn’t relish sitting in his room alone.

  Risyda’s room was a bit larger than Jasen’s own. In addition to the small table with two chairs that Jasen had in his room, there was also a lounging sofa.

  The first thing Risyda did was sit down on the sofa and kick off her shoes. Jasen followed suit, taking one of the chairs.

  She wiggled her toes. “The one nice thing about those blasted shoes is that they feel so good to take off.”

  Jasen made a sound of agreement and rubbed his foot. He already had a blister.

  “Now if only I could undo my hair. And my corset. Not ’til the end of the day, sadly.” She sighed. “Oh well.” She gave Jasen a mischievous look that he was already growing accustomed to. “I do have something that will ease our discomfort a little.”

  She went over to her bed, got onto her knees, and pulled out a box from underneath it. She brought it back to the sofa and opened it. Inside was something that looked like a bottle, along with some long tubes. She screwed the tubes onto the bottle and set it on the floor.

  “What is that?” Jasen asked.

  “A hookah,” she said. She pulled out a small pouch. “And this is kara weed. Have you ever tried it?”

  “I’ve never even heard of it.”

  “You really are a rube, aren’t you?”

  Jasen didn’t take offense. After all, he was.

  “You’re going to love it,” she said, packing the contents of the purse into the contraption. She concentrated for a moment; a burst of flame sprang out of her finger and lit the weed. She sucked one of the tubes, inhaling the smoke. With a contented sigh, she lay back on the sofa as she exhaled the smoke through her nose. “Mmmm. Now that is much better.” She offered one of the tubes to Jasen. “Your turn.”

  Jasen took the tube. “Could we get in trouble for this?”

  “Don’t tell me the man who sneaked out of his room to go frolicking with dragons is worried about a little kara weed.”

  She had a point. Jasen sucked in some of the smoke, and then fell into a coughing spasm.

  Risyda got up and patted him on the back until it was over. “I probably should have given you a little more instruction. Here, like this…”

  A few puffs later, Jasen got a handle on it. He felt wonderful all over. He’d never cared for wine or spirits, which always left him dizzy and sick. This, however, was just a comfortable buzzing feeling. He found himself sliding to the floor.

  “Well? How do you like it?”

  “I feel like I’m covered in bees,” Jasen said. “Nice bees. Bees that feel good.”

  Risyda laughed. “See? I told you.” She inhaled another puff and let it out in a few perfect rings. “All right, let’s get the getting-to-know-you bits over with. This is me: rich merchant father, I’m the youngest daughter, we don’t like each other, et cetera. He has been training me my whole life to fetch a good marriage price. I can’t decide whether I want to marry so I can escape him or screw him out of the gold he so desperately wants. Now you.”

  “Dead mother, drunk and gambling- addicted father. Same sort of deal with the marriage.”

  She beamed. “I just knew we would have a lot in common.” She rested her chin on her hand. “Now, to more interesting matters. Just what exactly happened this morning with you and the king?”

  Jasen only hesitated for a moment before the whole thing came spilling out. He knew he should be more cautious over whom he trusted, but the kara weed made him feel so relaxed and he desperately needed to sort through what happened. When he was finished, Risyda puffed thoughtfully on her pipe for a few moments. “You’re going to marry the king,” she finally said.

  Jasen groaned and fell back on the ground, one arm flung over his face. “I don’t want to marry a king!”

  “Why not?”

  “I don’t know anything about…well, anything! And to be king consort? To have the entire fate of the magic of the Allied Realms resting on whether or not I’m properly supportive? That’s a nightmare, not a dream come true.”

  “But what can you do? He’s already decided he wants you.”

  “You don’t know that. You can’t know that.”

  She waved her hand. “Of course I can. I have spent my whole life training to catch a suitor. I know the signs.”

  Jasen sat up and took a few morose puffs until he felt a little better. “What am I going to do?”

  “You’re going to have to make yourself utterly repulsive. Fortunately, I’m an expert on that as well.”

  Jasen frowned. “I don’t want to be repulsive to him.”

  “Oh, no. Don’t tell me you like him?” Jasen just gave her a miserable look. She took a few more contemplative puffs. “Well. This is all deliciously complicated.”

  Their conversation was interrupted by a knock of a strange rhythm on the door. Jasen sat straight up, the pleasant buzzing feeling rapidly fading in panic. “Quick! Get that thing back in the box—”

  Risyda waved her hand as she stood up. “Don’t worry, it’s fine.” She weaved her way to the door and opened it a crack. “Hello!” she said cheerfully.

  “Fucking hell, Risyda, I can smell you all the way down the hallway!” said a familiar voice. “I know you can control it, so why aren’t you?” The door opened a little more, revealing Larely.

  “Sorry,” Risyda said. She waved her hand. The smoke swirled into a ball in the middle of the room. Another wave and it disappeared with a small pop. “Better?”

  “Yes, but it isn’t even dark yet. Can’t you wait until everyone’s asleep at the very least?”

  “You worry too much. Everyone’s still at orientation.”

  “Just the same, you could really get into…” He trailed off when he finally saw Jasen. “Oh no. The two of you are friends now?” He put a hand over his face and groaned. “My life is about to get exponentially more difficult, isn’t it?”

  Risyda batted her eyelashes. “Do you want to come in?”

  Larely looked over his shoulder and then slipped in the door, shutting it behind him. “Just for a moment.” He crossed his arms as he looked down at Jasen, who was still sprawled on the floor. “Haven’t you already been in enough trouble today?”

  “Don’t let him lecture you about trouble,” Risyda said. “He is a very naughty guard.”

  This struck Jasen as the height of hilarity. He tried and failed to suppress a surge of unmanly giggles. Risyda joined him.

  “Oh, shut up, both of you,” Larely said, but it was good-natured. He grabbed one of the hoses and took a quick puff.

  “Keep it to—” he started, but had to stop as a coughing fit overcame him. That made Jasen laugh harder. “Ke
ep it to night from now on,” he finished after he got a hold of himself.

  Risyda saluted. “Aye-aye, captain.”

  “I mean it,” Larely said. “You could get sent home.”

  “We’ll be good, I promise,” Jasen said.

  Larely scoffed. “Oh, I doubt that very much, but try not to get caught.”

  “Keep clean where they can see me,” Jasen said, echoing Larely’s earlier words. “Got it.”

  “At your service, as always,” Larely said with an overly lavish bow. He winked at Risyda, which was interesting. Jasen had thought that Larely had been flirting with him earlier, but maybe he’d misjudged the situation. The two of them seemed awfully close.

  “I should go,” Jasen said, pushing himself off the floor. “I actually don’t want to go back to Grumhul just yet.” He fumbled for his shoes. It took him a few moments to get his balance when he stood.

  Risyda helped steady him. “Are you sure you can get to your room all right?”

  “’m fine,” Jasen muttered. And he was, mostly.

  But when he left her room, he almost immediately lost his sense of direction. He ended up going down when he should have gone up, and left when he should have gone right, and after wandering around for a little while, he realized he was hopelessly lost. The pleasant buzzing feeling had transformed into a raging headache.

  He found a staircase and managed to get back up to the second floor, but only after nearly breaking his neck falling down. The thought of having to go up yet another set of stairs was too daunting to consider. He was just considering trying to make his way back to Risyda’s room, possibly on his hands and knees, when he turned a corner and ran straight into Larely. Jasen stumbled and would have fallen, but Larely caught him. “Steady now,” he said, helping him regain his footing.

  “I hate these shoes,” Jasen said passionately. “And all these stairs. Why are there so many? And these halls. And all these doors that look alike.”

  “You’re lost, aren’t you?”

  “A little.”

  “Then I’ll show you back,” Larely said, linking his arm with Jasen’s. Jasen was grateful for the support.

  They reached Jasen’s room. “Here you are. Again.” Larely grinned at him. “This is the third time in twenty-four hours I’ve shown you to your room. Do you think it will stick this time?”

  “I would say yes, but I really can’t be sure.”

  Larely laughed. “That’s fine. I don’t mind rescuing you.”

  “Rescuing me?” Jasen scoffed. “Well, I wouldn’t quite put it like that.”

  “Whatever you say, my lord,” Larely said with an ironic little bow.

  Jasen muttered his thanks and stepped through the door. Once inside, he took off his shoes and lay down face first on his bed. He rolled over eventually and rubbed his face vigorously. A thousand thoughts swirled in his head. He had thought that he wanted to be away from Grumhul and his father more than anything else, but this was turning out to be far more complicated than he had anticipated. He was barely sure he wanted to be a lord consort at all, let alone king consort.

  At the same time, the king had been so handsome, and so kind. Nothing like he expected. Even thinking of him now made his heart beat a little faster.

  Eventually, he got up and splashed his face with some water, trying to banish the last of the kara weed’s effects. He would be expected to dine in the dining hall tonight. The thought of facing all of the consorts again made him queasy, but at least he had Risyda now. He decided to try to put aside his larger doubts and just make it through the evening intact. He could worry about the rest of it tomorrow.

  Chapter 4

  Early the next morning, Jasen was awoken by a knock on the door. Though he was an early riser, even he hadn’t gotten out of bed yet; the sun was barely up. Groggily, Jasen pulled on his dressing gown and answered the door. An impeccably dressed servant stood before him. He was an older man, with large cheeks and bulging eyes that made Jasen think of a toad.

  He gave Jasen a small bow. “Good morning, my lord. I am Rotheld, and I shall be your valet for the remainder of your stay.”

  “What happened to Dennack?”

  “Lady Isalei determined he was not up for the challenge.”

  “Oh,” Jasen said faintly.

  The man stepped inside, brushing past Jasen. He snapped his fingers—a whole rack of clothing followed him. “Would my lord like to begin dressing for his morning appointments now?”

  “Now?” Jasen said. “But the sun is barely up!”

  Rotheld took a deep breath and let it out through puffed cheeks. “To dress properly takes time, my lord.”

  There was something about Rotheld that told Jasen arguing with him would be futile. “Of course,” Jasen mumbled.

  They started with a shave, which was actually rather relaxing. When they were finished, Rotheld searched through the rack of clothing, occasionally looking at Jasen as if he were an interesting problem to solve. He at last selected a deep emerald green suit. “I think this will do.”

  Jasen had to admit that the clothes looked good (although apparently his opinion didn’t count for much since Rotheld didn’t ask for it). He went behind the dressing screen to change out of his night shirt and into his smalls. When he was finished, he went back to Rotheld, who was holding the dreaded corset. “Is that really necessary?” he asked.

  “A trim waist, a straight back, and strong shoulders are the ideal form of masculine beauty.”

  Jasen wanted to point out that his waist was already trim, but realized that it was probably futile. He subjected himself to the lacing. Fortunately, Rotheld was gentler than Dennack had been. It was still uncomfortable.

  Next, Rotheld helped him into a white shirt. “I like this,” Jasen said once he had it on. “Much less lace on the cuffs than what Dennack tried on me yesterday.”

  “My lord has a natural beauty,” Rotheld said. “I think items of a more subdued style would be appropriate.”

  The stockings went on next, and then the breeches. It took five full minutes to squeeze him into them. While Rotheld was lacing them up in the back, Jasen had a thought. “How am I supposed to relieve myself in these?”

  “With assistance.”

  The waistcoat and jacket were easy compared to the rest. Rotheld added a cravat of lace around his neck. Rotheld bade him to take a seat. He got out a brush from a kit he’d brought with him and ran it through Jasen’s hair. Jasen was nervous about what he was planning to do with it, given the elaborate styles he’d seen yesterday, but after some thought, Rotheld merely tied it at the base of his neck with a simple ribbon.

  Last were the hated shoes. He helped him up and steadied him when he wobbled. “We shall practice your walk later,” Rotheld said.

  “We shall?” Jasen asked with a sinking heart.

  “We shall,” Rotheld repeated firmly. He gave Jasen a gentle push towards the mirror. “Go see yourself,” he said, his tone somewhat softer.

  Jasen teetered over to the mirror and was stunned by what he saw. Gone was the unkempt boy from Grumhul. In his place stood a polished, beautiful young lord consort. He could barely believe it was him. For a moment, he didn’t feel like an impostor.

  Rotheld stepped behind him. “Is my lord satisfied?”

  “Yes.”

  He handed him a fan, which fastened around his wrist. “Then it is time for your meeting with Lady Isalei.”

  “What, already?” His stomach did a flip. He took one last look at himself, trying to glean some confidence from the handsome young lord in the mirror. He wasn’t sure if it worked.

  They walked down to the main floor, where they went under the stairs and down the hall, stopping at the last door on the right. Rotheld led him inside, bowed, and took his leave. The room was a cozy parlor. There was refreshments set out for two. Jasen wasn’t sure what he had been expecting, but this wasn’t it. He felt as if he were there to catch up with a doting aunt rather than endure an interrogation.

>   The lady herself wasn’t there, but she arrived shortly after. Jasen rose when she entered. “My lady,” he said, bowing.

  “Good morning, Lord Jasen,” she said with a nod. “I trust you slept well?”

  “Yes, my lady.”

  They took their seats. Jasen dredged up some ancient memories of etiquette and poured out the tea, as was expected of the younger person in a private setting. “So you do have some manners,” she said. “I’m certainly glad to see it.”

  “Yes, my lady.” He was too nauseated to drink himself, so he fiddled with his fan under the table.

  She took a sip of tea. “If you grip that fan any tighter, it’s going to break.”

  Jasen hastily released the fan. “Yes, my lady.”

  She waved a hand. “Let’s dispense with the yes-my-ladys for the time being. You needn’t be so nervous. I’m here to help you. You are not the first young consort who was rough around the edges. Tell me the education you do have, and we’ll work from there.”

  “I had tutors in reading and religion, as well as courtly manners,” he said. She raised an eyebrow. “Until I was twelve,” he finished. “My mother died, and my father was somewhat lax in continuing my education.”

  “I see,” she said. “And you’ve had nothing since then?”

  He shook his head.

  She sighed. “Well, it’s a challenge, but I’ve worked with rougher. Let’s have a spot to eat before we continue, shall we?”

  Jasen thought he was too nauseated to eat, but he discovered that a few biscuits and a cup of tea helped settle him.

  “Now, then,” the lady said when they were finished. “I am going to ask you a few questions, and you must answer me with complete honesty. If you are not honest with me, I will have you on a carriage back to Grumhul before you have time to blink. Am I understood?”

  The lump in Jasen’s throat felt too great to speak, so he simply nodded.

  “Were you really called by a dragon yesterday morning?”

  “Yes, my lady. I had decided to take a walk in the gardens, but before I knew it, I found myself in the draemir. Tasenred was waiting for me.”